Being a new Mom is a sublime challenge that one doesn’t fully grasp until they’re in it. If you know a new mommy, or are about to be a new mom yourself, read on friend.
I know you hear about them everywhere. That’s because these bad boys are worth 10 times their weight in gold! Things you need to know:
- It doesn’t have to be an expensive carrier. Check out this one (which is my tried and true favorite) that lasted through all three of my daughters!
- You need something EASY. I’m NOT saying wraps aren’t for you (to each their own). I’m saying that for me, at 3AM after five weeks of no REM sleep, I personally was level #aintnobodygottimeforthat OVER IT! I HIGHLY suggest you getting something with a simple buckle. Buckles are easy. Easy is your friend at 3am. Trust me.
Yes, I went there. Here’s the honest-to-goodness truth:
- It doesn’t matter if you’ve had a c-section or vaginal delivery. Pooping for the first week after baby is a thing. Rather, using the muscles you are oh so keenly aware of post baby to push calls for some… delicate care.
- Girlfriend, if you are too grossed out to read about poop on the internet you are in for an AWAKENING! #sorrynotsorry
This is such an important part of post baby recovery. New moms need help. You might notice yourself craving company but not really feeling up for a visit. Having a newborn can be one of the most ostracizing experiences of your life if you let it. I could probably write a post just about this but I’ll try my best to just give you the essential details.
- Plan before baby’s arrival. Get a calendar and call your friends and family. Spread out the visits over the first few months.
- Being surrounded by people significantly reduces your risk for PPD.
- Don’t be surprised if you don’t feel up to talking/playing hostess but don’t want to be alone. You will feel like no one could possibly understand this…but I PROMISE they do. Watch a movie. Let them hold your baby while it cries and you sleep. Whatever mindless recharging you need.
- Don’t be afraid to delegate! Asking someone to do your dishes or start a load of burp cloths is completely okay! Frankly, it is the currency I accept in return for baby cuddles.
- DON’T turn away visitors because you don’t feel “visitor ready”. When you have a newborn everyone expects you to smell funny from a combined lack of shower time and your baby’s bodily fluids that will inevitably be all over you.
YES. You read that right. If you are a new mom, you need grace on grace on grace. If you know a new mom, send them this article, call them, send a text, email…WHATEVER. Tell that mom she is doing great. Yes, everything is crazy. Yes, there is a weird smell that you can’t figure out the source. Girl, your life just went from being all about you – to someone else.
For. The. First. Time. Ever.
- Find yourself a seasoned vet with a baby close to your baby’s age. The more kids the better. Ask her outright to remind you to give yourself some grace.
- Go to said veteran Mom’s house. Go and sit at her house with your one baby. Surrounded by the chaos and noise. Soak it in. THIS IS NORMAL.
- Give your baby grace. When they are crying at 3AM it can truly feel like a personal attack. “What did I do to make you so mad at me!?? Pleaseeeee sleeeeep!” Take a deep breath and remember that babies don’t have vendettas.
- Give your husband grace. Yes, he is clueless. Yes, he is making mistakes. *ahem* Lest we forget, you’re a sinner too! Mother’s intuition is real. ( and I don’t think it’s a coincidence that they don’t talk about father’s intuition….)
- Write down in excruciating detail what you need from your husband. Tape it on the fridge. Eye level. Help him help you.
- Say ‘I’m sorry’ often. To yourself. To your baby. To your spouse.
Raising a new little life is a joyous and exhausting learning curve. However, with these FOUR essentials- you’re in it to win it, sister.